Unreal Dating

8:20 am. Thursday. September 24, 2009

Lanie: So I went on a date last night.

Mom: Wonderful.

Lanie: Not so much.

Mom: Not so much?

Lanie: Imagine if Woody Allen and Larry David had a love child.

Mom: That could be sexy.

Lanie: If Woody Allen and Larry David weren't famous they wouldn't be sexy at all.

Mom: Okay, so this guy was a dork. Big deal.

Lanie: Mom, we went for coffee. He complained about the price of the coffee.

Mom: Was it expensive?

Lanie: Mom! He then complained about everything.

Mom: Like what?

Lanie: I mean everything. The weather, the jazz trio playing in the park, how he thought playwrights were suppose to know more about movies, how his parents didn't invite him on their Hawaiian vacation, and finally to top if off he complained about his cousin the dry cleaner.

Mom: What?

Lanie: It felt like the twilight zone.

Mom: I'm sorry. How'd it end?

Lanie: I saw a one armed man playing ping pong near and said "Wow. That's cool. Shoot I've got to go walk my dog."

Mom: How long were you with him?

Lanie: 23 minutes.

Mom: So it was a speed date.